1st you know the exact number of weeks AND days pregnant you are at any given moment
3rd you’ve lost track of the number of weeks and the best you can do is give a ball park figure when asked
1st you write each weekly milestone of pregnancy in your diary all the way up to 40 – where you stop because you will give birth on your due date, right?
3rd you get around to writing your due date in when you’re almost there, knowing full well it means nothing but you feel like you should write it in anyway.
1st you actively shop for maternity clothes figuring 9 months is a long time so therefore you will need many maternity options.
3rd you know 9 months is going to fly by so you don’t waste money on maternity clothes, you’d rather spend the money on actual nice clothes that you will wear in real, non-pregnant life.
1st you diligently get measured regularly to ensure you are wearing the correct fitting bra
3rd you don’t bother getting measured and you know the bra you’re wearing is ill fitting
1st you research and anxiously avoid all the things you’re advised to avoid
3rd you eat ALL THE CHEESE and drink what you want because as long as you’re not drunk it’s probably OK and the french do it, right?! You don’t even know if the French actually do but it sounds good and you want the cheese. When did cheese ever harm anyone?
1st you buy all the baby stuff, everything you could possibly need, and well in advance
3rd you buy nothing
1st you decorate the nursery even though the baby won’t be sleeping in there and your own bedroom is in far more desperate need of a lick of paint, you dispense the nappies into cute wicker baskets etc so that everything is just so.
3rd there’s no nursery, you realise it’s pointless as baby will either sleep next to you in its crib or in your bed. Nappies are kept in their plastic packaging and will be ripped out when required
1st you install a changing table – a whole area dedicated to nappy changing with everything you need to hand
3rd you guess you will change baby’s nappy on your bed. No changing station required.
1st you wash all the clothes beforehand even the new ones with fancy (expensive) non bio detergent and iron them all.
3rd – you wash the secondhand bits but assume anything new will be fine
1st – you worry about everything and read up on everything that could go wrong
3rd – you don’t worry because you’re worrying quota is consumed by the other kids who are on the move
1st – you cook batches of food to puree and freeze it in an organised fashion
3rd – you opt for baby led weaning not because you think it’s better but because you dont have time to puree and can’t be bothered. Baby can eat what big bro does.
1st you believe only fresh and organic produce should pass baby’s lips.
3rd whatever is going – pizza, chips, chocolate – that’s all fine.
1st you will them to sit up, walk, talk
3rd you pray they don’t start moving early because that makes everything more difficult
1st you worry about labour a lot.
2nd you worry how you will love the new baby since you love your first so much
3rd you worry where they will all sleep
1st you buy ALL THE THINGS
2nd you know what you need this time so you make a spreadsheet and limit yourself to buying the things on it
3rd you realise you don’t even have the basic necessities because you were just assuming you had everything already (but had forgotten how most baby vests did not survive explosive korma poo gate).
1st all your friends are so excited and throw a babyshower which is planned long in advance and they all attend
3rd nobody really cares that you’re having another baby.
1st you take loads of pictures of your bump as it grows
3rd you realise you have one picture, which is blurry because you took it yourself in the mirror.
1st you have too many name options and cannot decide
2nd you pick the one name you like and stick with it
3rd you have run out of names and have no idea what to call him
1st you dress your baby like a mini human in actual clothes
3rd they live in sleepsuits, mostly weetabix encrusted ones.
1st you wonder if everything downstairs will go back to normal or whether you’ll be ruined forever.
3rd you know your body is capable of amazing things and you have the self-healing powers of wolverine… but you accept that you probably need to wear a panty liner if you plan on trampolining.
1st you worry about how bad labour will be
3rd you look forward to labour knowing it can be the best day of your life.
1st you have no idea what to expect and swing between being blissfully unaware and sick with fear
3rd you feel more confident than ever before that you are going to love this little squish ball so much. You know that you’re going to be a better mother because you are more relaxed than ever, but you also know you will never be able to give him/her as much attention as the ones that came before.
1st you worry how you will survive the sleepless nights of the newborn phase
3rd you feel sad thinking how quick the newborn phase goes and wish it lasted longer